недела, ноември 11, 2001

And then I said to myself, damn it...you cannot write. Even the simplest 200-word reaction paper is a big problem for you, and it wasn’t supposed to be this way. You would love to write but you cannot write about anything else but yourself and that’s not exactly a talent, anybody who wouldn’t mind wasting his time (like you do) could do it. And it’s like all that is inside me stays there and dies there and I feel very sorry for that but there is nothing I can do to save it. This week it’s terrible, my i-net connection is worst than ever and even if I write something which I would be proud of myself the connection stops and the “blog this” shit doesn’t register anything that I cared to write down. And now I’m trying since 9 A.M to connect via this dial up thing but it just doesn’t work.
I guess it’s my P.M.S. period and that’s the reason I am so nervous, I cannot concentrate on one thing for more than 5 minutes, and I am terrible. There is a fire burning in my head and I think I will explode any moment (even tough I have already exploded today for a piece of tomato There is a little sun coming through my window but outside it’s very cold. On MTV Hey and cisza ja i czas, one of the greatest bands in Poland with one of the most original women in the Polish rock scene- Kasia Nosowska. She has a new look, dreadlocks. There are too many people in Wroclaw wearing dreadlocks...why is it that if something comes in fashion I begin to hate it, I get sick from it, so now it’s the dreadlocks situation that I hate, before that was I guess the Capri trousers (those short little pink sweet disgusting pantaloons which every girl used to wear during summer and it was so very ugly, I started to hate going out because of being doomed to watch girls with blue and pink Capri trousers)
I am nervous because, this week I haven’t been alone at home for 5 minutes, so that means that I have to beware my every step because I will have to hear this unpleasant high-pitched voice for the next 30 minutes for i.e. not leaving a pen in the right shelf. I see that I have changed 10 subjects in 20 sentences...hihihih...I begun to like it. Why don’t I just throw everything down, here, first on word processor and then on my blog. The hell with it I will. Now a little light glows in my head and it says CENSORSHIP... bip bip...that’s the end of it, don’t write about you state of mind, u are registered on the biggest portals with your real name and surname, so u have to watch your stupid reputation, what if someone who knows u read this, what if someone who knows you reads about him of herself here...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

I am watching MTV news...the Corrs ...discusting, Magda Femme.....Nice synonym but disgusting, five-a non-excisting boys-bend...only good news, Michael Jackson will shoot a movie with Liza Minelli about two artists not being able to make a career. Britney Spears with her sweet voice is telling about her new album, oh, guess what she just said fuck on MTV...I cannot believe it, holly Britney Spears.Halleluiah. Corrs new album, the best of...how original
Now playing on MTV-Dido- hunter

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